Archive for July, 2009
How To Break-Up From A Relationship

Love is an incredibly beautiful thing but sometimes it just simply has to come to an end and this opens the age old dilemma—how to break up from a relationship. There are various reasons why people break up. Break up moments are usually filled with high emotions — at least for one person and associated drama. Break ups are tricky things to go through but the following break up advice could make handling the process a little easier.
Understand your reasons: Okay. So you want to break up. The first question is not really how to break up but why you want to break up. Understanding the reasons behind your break up will provide a more peaceful transition. You will also be able to explain to your partner when he or she inevitably asks you. Understanding your reasons will also provide you with closure. Knowing the reason why you could not be with a person, will prevent you from suddenly breaking into worried doubts of your possible past.
Confront your emotions. Be honest about your feelings. Most people go through a break up by trying to bottle their emotions. There is nothing wrong with doing a little soul search. There is absolutely nothing wrong with crying. Break-ups put a lot of stress on the mental and psychological will of an individual. Bottling up all the stress will just prove detrimental in the long run. By facing the situations and reasons leading up to the break up, you will be able to shorten the transition process of heartache.
Keep a distance. It is common for people who have just broken up to want to maintain some form of continued friendship. There is nothing wrong with this in the long run. But in the early weeks following a break-up it is best if you two do not spend too much time together. Early proximity will only result in resentment, anger, guilt and a possible reunion — which will prove detrimental if your reasons for a break up were noteworthy.
Save the Drama For Your Mama: Tips for Women
Here are some tips for women who may be looking for reasons why her man is being so distant. One of the biggest mistakes women make that causes men to leave is to overload the relationship with drama. Women tend to bring too much “drama” into the relationship. Men want to feel good and want to be around a woman that makes them feel good about themselves and a woman who feels good about her own life in general.
Did you know that a woman’s smile is considered by men to be one of the most sexy things about a woman (as confirmed by a university study wherein they surveyed hundreds of men about what makes a woman attractive to them). A woman’s smile tells a man that they are pleased with him and with her life. If women really knew and understood this they would be smiling all the time!
So many times, however, women tend to bring unnecessary drama into their relationship. It’s been noted that “Some women are more predisposed to drama than others — often finding occasions to manufacture the drama, much like a screenwriter purposely adds conflict to a story to make a screenplay more interesting.” I think this is may be a true statement about the majority of women.
The drama usually involves talking about their feelings and expressing their emotions — and men generally flee from such. There are four words in the English language that cause immediate dread in a man’s heart. Those words are a woman telling him, “We need to talk.” His usual reaction is “Oh no, what did I do now?” or “Oh <#@!$%>, not again!” Talking about feelings and expressing emotions — especially when it comes to relationships — is not something a man ranks high on his “feel good” chart.
Men are programmed to run from emotions — especially intense emotions. An occasional emotion-packed event or conversation is usually tolerable to a man, but when it becomes a constant pattern and you habitually involve him in ongoing drama, hs only recourse is to try to escape from the source of that drama — that is, you! So “Save the Drama for your Mama” and save your relationship too!
Think Before You Take That Relationship Quiz!
When flipping through a magazine, you’re bound to come across a relationship quiz. Some of them seem cute and harmless while others claim to offer insight into where your relationship is really headed! Are these quizzes really useful in keeping your romance healthy? Or are they good for a little fun and nothing more? While there is certainly nothing wrong with taking a relationship quiz, there are some things you need to remember about them.
Be Real
If you are having relationship issues, the person you should be speaking to is your partner, not a relationship quiz! Bear in mind that most of these quizzes are put together simply to boost magazine sales and to make sure the readers have a bit of fun. However, it’s easy to see how some people might end up taking these quizzes seriously. Sometimes, a particular scenario might ring true - when that comes coupled with a murky romantic prediction, it’s easy to start assuming the worst!
So does that mean you should never take a relationship quiz? Of course not - it simply means that you shouldn’t look to these quizzes for romantic direction or any kind of relationship advice. However, a quiz can in fact be a fun activity for you and your favorite person to do together. When you’re just lounging around, spending the day together, doing a quiz can be fun and a great way to spend time together.
Just remember that these are just quizzes for fun so make sure you have fun when you fill them out. There are a number of really whacky quizzes out there that you and your partner can really have a laugh over! But when it comes to the important things, make sure that you communicate with your partner face to face. Don’t blindly trust a twenty-question relationship quiz to tell you what your romantic future looks like.
Rules For Women In The Dating Game

Please – take a moment and think to yourself – what does the term ‘dating game’ mean to you?
This may have a negative connotation to many of you, both male and female, that are still single. THIS SHOULD NOT BE THE CASE!
I know that all of us consider ourselves to be good people, and we all probably claim, ‘I don’t play games.’ The truth is – chances are we all do, in our own way. Games are fun. The dating game can be fun too if you let it. You just need a little perspective.
Here are some ‘must-follow’ tips for women who think they are tired of the dating game:
1. Don’t decide what you are looking for in a relationship before there is even a relationship to speak of – this only sets you up for failure! Life is unpredictable. You may want to find your soul mate, and miss out on an excellent friendship, or vice versa! Just go with the flow, sister!
2. Stop taking yourself so seriously – It’s not, never was, and never will be – all about you and your needs, and your wants, and your future. It’s about you and everyone else in the world.
3. Take advantage of your single situation – You can go anywhere you want to meet people and date anyone you want to. Look at this as an exciting opportunity you have that the unhappily married neighbor may never have again.
4. Try something new – instead of giving up, try something that you’ve never tried before, such as speed dating or on-line love connection sites.
5. HAVE FUN! – If you follow the first 5 rules, this one should be easy!
Follow these rules, and you might become a pro and learn to love the dating game!
Internet Dating Tips For Men Over 50

In our ever increasing virtual world, on-line dating tips for men may prove to be the most useful and needed, especially for those that are no longer in their 20s.
Although it is no longer unusual to hear about Internet love connections, many men are still uneasy with the idea. Perhaps you were not raised on-line, addicted to MySpace and Facebook since you were 13, or receive your Yahoo IMs in your iPhone.
Well, you may have come to the conclusion that it is time to try something different. Perhaps you are recently divorced and not interested in the bar scene; or maybe you have been single your whole life and you are ready to try this out.
Congratulations! You are on your way to discovering a whole new world of opportunity. But wait! Before you men throw yourselves out there, there are a few Internet dating tips for men to follow.
1. Even virtually, women are still looking for the same thing in an older man. We are not interested in dating games. We want a strong, independent man who is charming, strong and confident.
2. Decide what you are looking for in a woman, and create your on-line identity accordingly. If friendship is what you seek, then display yourself as a man that a woman would want to be friends with.
3. When you are deciding on the women to contact, make sure to read their profiles carefully to get a feel for who they are and what they are looking for. Don’t base your energy on one dimension – you don’t want to waste your time, or hers.
There are some people that have little luck in the virtual romance world, but men that abide by these Internet dating tips are off to an excellent start and just might find their true love.
Dating Tips
Dating can be intimidating. In such a situation a few dating tips can make your experience easier. First, you need to meet people and hang out with them. Go out and have fun. Any social event can produce potential mates. Your workplace is great for making new friends, not dates. If you go on a date with a co-worker and things don’t work out, it could get awkward. If you date several different co-workers, things could really get messy.
Never date more than one person at a time. That doesn’t mean you have to seriously commit to the first person you meet, but if you want to see him or her again, don’t date anyone else in between. If you don’t intend on seeing him/her again, then, by all means, date someone else.
A good dating tip is to decide what you want to achieve with dating. Generally dating leads to marriage. Sometimes you have to date many different people before you find one you want to get serious with. Dating tips will tell you that dating should always be fun, wherever it might lead.
Don’t be afraid of rejection. If you want to ask someone out, go for it, no matter what your friends say. A dating tip from your married friend is not necessarily good advice. Before taking any advice, ask yourself, “What is their hidden agenda?” Married friends usually want to get you married off as soon as possible so you can do family things together.
Dating is fun. People that write lists and plan a precise dating strategy will end up disappointed when things don’t go according to plan. There is a big difference between knowing what you want and trying to guide your potential mate along the lines of your plan.
Time is important. So the best dating tip: don’t waste too much time with someone who doesn’t want the relationship heading in the same direction as you.
Are You In A Healthy Relationship?
Most of us are so desperate to be in a relationship that we often don’t wait to find out if we are in a healthy relationship. Television dramas, romantic comedies, and books have turned many of us into a generation of women longing for love and often finding it in all the wrong places. The problem is not limited to women - an increasing number of men are reporting what everyone has suspected for long - that men too have their share of relationship problems!
A healthy relationship is one where both partners feel loved, respected, and secure. It allows two people to grow without growing apart. It allows them to nurture each other without losing their own identity or personal space. Many romances start out based on looks, wealth, social status, or even the car you are driving. While these are not predictors of a bad relationship, they may not help you have a healthy relationship unless you can build a solid foundation based on trust, respect, and mutual give and take. Here Are Things That Make A Healthy Relationship:
Respect: Before the heady chemistry, comes respect as a determiner of the health of a relationship. Don’t get into the often virulent and destructive “passionate romance” obsession until you are sure your partner respects you.
Trust: Not able to trust the other person to not cheat on you, not swipe your credit card for shopping, or even keep their promise of meeting you for lunch? Rethink the relationship.
Sharing: This includes a whole range of things - from material possessions to thoughts, time, feelings, joys, doubts, memories…the list is endless. A healthy relationship involves lots of sharing. Sharing leads to better understanding of each other and lessens conflicts.
Willingness to recognize and sort out problems: If you are not in a healthy relationship and you see that you are in a sticky situation, any attempts at conflict resolution will be useless if both partners are not willing to work on problems.
By learning what constitutes a healthy relationship, you can avoid bad relationships and strengthen the existing bond with your partner.
Marriage Advice For A Great Marriage
Researchers have derived a magic relationship ratio that allows them to very accurately predict the probability of a relationship lasting based on the amount of Negative vs. Positive interaction. See the above video for details. Researchers all conclude that the primary reason for failed marriages is the lack of communication and more importantly the lack of positive communication. Couples seldom take the time to learn how to communicate and listen to one another effectively. Throughout the marriage there will be times when conversation will be required. These are the conversations that you both may not want to talk about. Here are a few marriage tips and strategies you can use when you have to talk.
1) Avoid Negative and non-productive Comments. Some things are better left unsaid if they will elicit negative feelings and emotions. If you respond to one another without really thinking first about how it might sound to your partner, start thinking before allowing the negativity to take over.
2) Recognize the difference between thoughts and emotional (not physical) feelings. Accept that feelings of your partner neither right nor wrong. It’s the behavior that results because of the feeling that makes the difference whether right or wrong. Rejecting a feeling is rejecting the person feeling it. Don’t say things like ‘Don’t worry, be happy’ or ‘You shouldn’t feel that way.’
3) Learn to agreeably disagree. The key to not allowing these disagreements create hostility in your marriage or to hurt your marriage. Know when to agree to disagree. Don’t fight to win. Fight for your marriage.
4) Accept the fact that you can’t change your partner. Besides that not your job anyway. You can only change yourself and your own reactions. Changing your own behavior may trigger your spouse to want to make changes.
5) Love covers a multitude of sins. Learn to walk in love and overlook the shortcomings of others. Look at your mate through the lens of love and you will see only the best qualities. Add a pinch of grace to every marriage decision and you will find your marriage getting better and better.
Dating Advice
Some people are ‘relationship junkies’, dating advice means nothing to them. They simply don’t know how to date. They latch onto the first person who shows any kind of interest and try to spend every waking moment with him or her. Good dating advice dictates that dating should be fun. If it leads to marriage, great, if it doesn’t, don’t worry - the right one will come along.
Generally you should get to know someone in a social setting before deciding to date. If you’ve met on the Internet, you should talk to him or her on the phone before meeting in person. Your first meeting should be a well lit, populated place. This will not only guarantee that he or she is not a serial killer, but also keep you safe for the time being.
Never talk about past relationships, on any date. Even if you have been dating for months, comparing him or her to an ex is always a turn off. Your entire focus should be on the person you are with. After a date, don’t sit by the phone waiting for a call. You will only depress yourself. If he doesn’t call within a week, move on. Time is precious, not to be wasted.
Sound dating advice will help you decide which type of person is best for you. Where to meet that person and how to hang onto him! The best advice is ‘are you’. If you start the relationship off with fake personae, things will fall apart fast. “Lies have short legs” and the truth will come out when you least expect it.
Finding a new love is exciting. You are filled with joy and expectation. Don’t move too fast, though. Take your time getting to know each other, and above all, have fun. You will have enough time to worry about serious issues after you are married. Take some good dating advice - go out there and find your mate.
Dating Advice for Women
Ladies make many mistakes in the dating game, which is what makes dating advice for women so important. We are here to help you make wiser choices. We want you to find that lasting love you long to have.
Six Tips To Keep In Mind:
1. Don’t talk about past relationships: Whether you had one bad date, or an eight-year marriage, your new potential mate does not need, or want, the details.
2. Don’t pretend to be someone you are not: You won’t be able to keep up a false personality forever, so just be yourself right off the bat.
3. Don’t rush him into something he might not be ready for: You might think he is the answer to all your prayers, but he might not feel the same way about you. Even if he does, he might not know it or be ready to show it. Give him space and time to figure out how he feels.
4. Don’t put yourself down: Don’t brag about yourself, but be open to compliments. Hen he says something nice, just say, “thank you”. He doesn’t care how many hours you spent getting ready or where you got your outfit from.
5. Don’t make him wait: We have all seen the movies where the woman will make the man wait so she can make a grand entrance. That is not only rude, it is selfish. You will be extremely annoyed if he shows up late, so be punctual.
6. Don’t be a ‘yes woman’: Men might act like they want to be in control, but the truth is, he is just as nervous as you are. Maybe even more. You can not have an intelligent conversation with someone who agrees with everything you say. If you do agree, great, express that honestly and expand on your thoughts.
Good dating advice for women can help you develop a strong relationship.