pRelationship

Found another great article from Bob Grant that gets to the very heart of a problem a lot of women have when it comes to progressing in a relationship.  It has some great insights and tips for women who are struggling with attracting  developing relationships with men. Most women have been told that men don’t like women who are needy or overly emotional.   This may have sounded like good advice but it’s only a half truth. Men also do not like women who show no emotion or passion and are totally independent. That’s the other side of the coin. Let it be known up front that playing it cool and acting emotionally detached as a lifestyle doesn’t work very well with men. However, when it comes to getting a man back after a breakup, playing it cool, can be very helpful in restoring a failing relationship.

Let’s go a little further and you’ll see why. They’ve probably had experiences that validated those stereotypes about men. Perhaps one of a woman’s past boyfriends complained about the fact that she wanted to spend too much time together. He may have said something to the extent of, “Why can’t you be happy doing your own thing?” This may give the false impression that he is saying the she is too “needy”. But that is not necessarily the case.

Another example: Other women get married and hear from their husbands something similar to that statement. For example, a man might ask, “Why do you get upset when I don’t want to spend as much time together as you do?” Regardless of how you interpret these messages, it can hurt when a man you care about seems to look down on your desire for closeness and intimacy. As a result, a woman’s response is often predictable. In an effort to not appear “needy”, many women choose to overcompensate and make certain that they can never be accused of being weak, stupid or needy. They learn to manage their feelings and to never complain unless they have ample evidence that justifies their feelings. In short, they learn to “play it cool” and act as if very little upsets them.

But what happens when women choose this path? They accomplish their goal of appearing strong and self sufficient. In time, all of the men in their life will soon respect them but very few are attracted to them. It’s a perfectly safe way to live, and there’s nothing wrong with this approach. It’s just lonely.

Professional women, both married and single, boast about how they don’t need a man, but they’d just like an equal relationship based on mutual respect. But because their relationships lack passion, they wonder why being independent and strong doesn’t seem to be valued by men.

The answer is that while these women have trained men to respect them, in the process, they have abandoned what men really want - to be cherished. Why can’t they have both? A relationship is about complimentary styles working together to create a whole. In the work environment, all  interactions are about being respected. But in a relationship, a man wants to cherish a woman, not respect her. This requires her to learn how to put her heart first.

Have you ever seen those women who are NOT as the most attractive or sophisticated, but they just “know” how to attract men and drive them “crazy” with desire? They have a “natural” ability to be irresistible to men, so men are always asking them out and working hard for their attention.

So let me ask you? Whether you’re married or single, are you ready to stop acting like you don’t need a man? Do you want to experience the joy that comes from being cherished or do you insist that he respects you?
It’s true, it is safer playing it cool, but a man won’t feel passion for such a woman. So if you chose that path, prepare to be lonely.

Many women don’t understand why their partner, or significant other, needs admiration. Women in general thrive on affection and basic appreciation, yet the men tend to share a relationship which can easily be  fueled by simple  admiration.  If you are a woman in a relationship, and you find yourself having challenges with strengthening that relationship, I submit to you that it could be that you need to display more admiration towards your significant other.

It may be hard to understand just why he needs admiration, but it is something that you will need to accept.   So if you are serious about strengthening your relationship I suggest you use these basic strategies and relationship tips on how to display your admiration for him.

It is important that you take into consideration the distinct emotional differences between men and women. At an early age most men are urged to perform at high capacities and to provide their very best effort in all of their endeavors. This is typically evident when it comes to sports,  competitions, academics, and work in general.  They develop what is considered a “fix it” type of persona that motivates them to push forward, to conquer every adversary, to solve every problem. When in a relationship, it is important for a man to feel as if he is needed and appreciated by his significant other.  We call this the “Knight in shining armor” attitude.

Therefore, it is essential that you work to ensure that you accept your man for who he is as a person. All too often, women will become involved in a relationship and will push their significant other to become who they feel that they should be. In all actuality, this can actually push a man away emotionally and lead to other types of complications in the relationship.

it is important to understand that the feeling of being appreciated is essential for a man’s emotional health. When you make him feel that you are thankful for the efforts that he makes, the goals that he accomplishes, and just for being him it literally makes his day.

Fro most men, being special in their own right is more important that the money he brings in from working long hours, the position that he has at work, or who won the big football game he has been looking forward to. It makes him feel god about who he is as an individual, and it generates happiness. So, if you want to make your man feel admired, try the following:

1. Take the time to say thank you to your significant other. Inform them that you are glad that they are who they are, and brag a little on their accomplishments and abilities. This will make them really feel admired by you. If you don’t take the time to say something he may be soon drawn towards someone else who will.

2. When handling a tough problem at work, with friends, with relatives, or around the house, sit down and ask your significant other for advice and how they would handle it. All too many times, women have a knack for taking on the world and solving their own issues. If you pull in your significant other to help, you will show them that you appreciate their input. Even if you know the right solution, let him figure it out and compliment him on it.

3. Include your man in on important decisions. Allow the decisions to be handled in your way and his. If the decision turns out to be the right one, Give him the credit for making the right choice. Let him know how much you appreciate him and his decision making skills.  Compliment him on being a great leader.  If you do he will soon become one.

Understanding why he needs admiration may be a challenge but just accepting it and using the strategies outlined here can have a positive impact on your relationship. Of course, there are other steps you need to build a healthy relationship.  So, visit my web site to learn more at:  www.prelationship.com